Friday, July 30, 2010

Empty vessels

It's definitely Mind over Matter for me.

I don't Mind,
for whatever shit you created
do not Matter.

Sometimes I wish I have this switch to shut you up.



Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Ponder

Is it right
to continue stay
in that very place
where so many things irk
you to your core
making you want
to swear off and kick-ass?

Sunday, July 25, 2010

明白

CS 被派出国公干,
整个周末都不在新加坡。

离开后一整天,
一直都没收到他任何消息,
发了几则简讯也没有任何回应。

原以为他应该在忙,
所以没有打电话打扰;
可是到了很晚都还是没有他的消息,
我开始心急。

打给他的手机,
发现手机是关上的。

这时我真的慌了,
我已完全无法联络上他。

脑子里充满着混乱的思绪,
到底该怎么办,究竟发生了什么事?

不久电话响了,
是 CS。

他还在工作,
还没有回酒店。

原来 CS 手机不知为何,
一直收不到我发送出的简讯;
也不知为何我一直没法打进。

我话还没说出口,
就哭成了一团,久久无法恢复。

这件事,
让我深刻明白了一些事。

若有人再问我,
why him?

Because I realised,
I can no longer live without him.



Wednesday, July 21, 2010

继续

从前有个小孩

为了寻找更美好的旅途
他试图探入沿途看似更加美好的分歧路
小心翼翼地勇敢着

就算得与毒蛇猛兽大战一番
弄得自己遍体鳞伤
就算最后发现必须往回走
枉费一番精神和精力后

他从不沮丧
或放弃美好的寻觅

因为他知道
这些路不算白走

因为他相信
而且会更加努力
迈向理想的向往

我深爱着如这小孩一般的
就犹如他深爱着心爱的人
为了她乐观勇敢前进



Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Changing for the better

I am a rather careful eater.

I always try to think through
what I am putting into my mouth
before I act upon it.

However sometimes when the mind gets so tired,
it is not in the right stage to think about such things,
especially when the stomach is simply yearning for food.

Hence I ended up eating instant and processed foods,
mostly at the end of the day.

Recently I have been rather inspired
by CS who always tries to make salads for work,
some colleagues who have really sumptous home-made salads for lunch,
and The Book: The Amazing Adventures of the Diet Girl.

You know, I love salads. :)

I simply love the taste and smell of fresh vegetables,
best with cheese and ham.

But I reckon that making salads at night or in the morning
are not quite possible given the weariness at those time of the day.

So today I changed my diet a little,
having salad for dinner. :)

So far everything was great,
except for that cheap smokey ham my Mom bought.
The after-taste was quite unbearable for me.
Nevertheless, it was a good start.

Tomorrow onwards,
I shall move on to another chapter
of my gastronomy journey.

My usual wholemeal bread for breakfast,
a full lunch with minimial carbohydrates,
salad for dinner, with plenty of fruits in-between.

I am so looking forward to sticking to it,
and shopping for my salad input with CS every weekend.

Kudos to good health and a happy mind!



Thursday, July 08, 2010

Health Log [8 July 2010]

Have not been updating for awhile,
a lot has happened, while plenty still have not.

In my last post regarding my health,
I think I vaguely mentioned that I have been seeking
the help of Traditional Chinese Medical Practice
at 中华医院, Chung Hwa Medical Institution.

That was in April, I think,
after that traumatic gastroscope found nothing.

Now 4 months has passed by,
I am still going to the clinic for my weekly dosage of TCM,
and I felt so much better.

All TCM doctors at the clinic asked me
if I was under tremendous stress,
and I wonder what stress are they talking about.

The stress was a few years ago,
yes, damn stressful.

But now, it's just weariness.

Went for my throat review at the voice clinic on Tuesday,
Doc did another scope down the throat,
and commented the swelling has gone down,
though still a little red and sore.

I told them I went TCM
after that fateful day they decided to let me go
without telling what's going on, and no medication given.

They looked grim,
as if I have gone to the dark side.

Nevertheless,
they gave me another appointment in December,
just to make sure everything is really going well.

I am so grateful for TCM,
despite the fact that all doctors look like
the aunties and uncles you find in the wet market.

I feel so supported during this trying period,
and seeing them every week makes me feel that
I am not alone in this battle against my body ailment.

Met up with Xuan some time after I came back from Japan,
she was seeing TCM too, to build up general health.

We both agreed that we are really getting old.

Yes, OLD.

As I am typing away,
my kneecap and other joints of my body
take turns to act up.

For the past few days,
I have been taking the supplements "Glucosamine"
I bought for my Mom.

Mind you, I have not had a baby yet.

I really need to take good care,
so that life wouldn't be so tough when I get pregnant.

CS has been going lengths for a healthier body as well.

He has been making salads lunchbox for lunch,
and running every day.

He says he wants to be strong strong for me. ^_^

I want to be strong strong as well.

Thank God for all the things that go well.

We will work harder for all the things that did not.

Sunday, July 04, 2010

Nuisance

We were strolling in the bus interchange towards the queue,
when we saw this couple standing at the side of a pillar.

"What do you want me to do?
If you want, my mother can give us her room."

The man was heard saying.

Another couple frustrated about accomodation,
I told CS.

This morning came the news that,
our Finance Minister wants to shape Singapore,
into one of the most liveable cities in the world.

I am amused.

If so many couples who are intending to get married,
aren't able to find an affordable and immediate place to live in,
how liveable is Singapore exactly?

It makes me angry,
when politicians, ministries and people up there in general,
make statements without really getting to know the truth out there.

So many examples of such nowadays,
I wonder who are really for the citizens at all.