Tuesday, September 08, 2009


A friend called this morning,
when I was still in bed,
half-asleep half-awake.

He was making arrangements with me,
so that we can travel together to attend
a royal birthday cum house-warming.

It felt good,
when I was done with the call,
bringing back happy moments I had,
with this bunch of friends.

Mature, respectful and non-obligated,
yet taking care of each other whenever together.

We do not have to meet very often,
yet when we do, we always feel very comfortable.

Different people have very different expectations of

Some people require their friends
to reciprocate their every good intention,
and attend their every little gathering.

They feel that friends should be like partners.

They should do things together,
and be so close that no other people can come between.

If they do not try as hard as they do,
then they will feel that this person,
is not worthy of their friendship,
and will only be an acquaintance.

Others are more tolerant.

They do not enforce an unsaid obligation on friends,
and have so high of an expectation of them.

They look out for them,
whenever they are together,
yet they do not expect them to meet up every now and then.

They are more inclusive and friendlier,
to people beyond their "cliques",
making them feel welcome and safe.

I enjoy the company of such friends.

If I were to do something for them,
I know it is because I want to do it,
not out of pressure nor obligation.

I do not like to do things because of peer pressure,
this will feel very suffocating and too teenager.

I do not expect friends to be like my partner,
neither do I want them to expect such of me.

But I will still keep a look out for them,
and they, I know they will, for me.

No obligations, no expectations,
always based on trust, respectful and understanding.

But of course,
there are then people who take advantage of such friends,
meeting them only when they need help or want something.

There is no right or wrong,
just a matter of choice and personality.

So which are you,
and which do you want to be?


si kang said...

"We do not have to meet very often,
yet when we do, we always feel very comfortable."

yes, this is what i define friend as well, or rather, good friend. :)

蓝月 said...

that's what i thought too :)