Sunday, July 29, 2007

三十

或许是近期许多人,
渐渐步入了新的旅程。

更大的可能,
是自己总是觉得,
未来存在着更多可能。

我总是在思考着未来的方向。

若依照着大家对事业的定义,
或许我不应该在想到工作前,
先想到自己。

在一年两次的评估中,
上头都会以你今年的工作表现,
衡量你的潜力。

在他们心目中,你能爬得多高,
直接影响你的升职加薪。

有人说我能爬得很高,
令我曾一度想过努力爬上这梯级。

午夜梦回,
我总会为自己这样的想法,
感到极度不安。

我的价值,
不应该由别人定论。

生活把我放进一个鼠窝,
不代表我必须依照它们的方式生活。

It's a rat-race,
but I am NOT a rat.

于是每个周末,
我尽量阻止自己工作,
尽管常常失败。

我很想离开,
把世界看了一圈才回来。

这世界很大,
我的工作圈子却很小。

我不想步入30那天,
埋怨着岁月的流失。

然后隔天,
依然一成不变、日复一日。

30 应该是一个美丽的数字。

为了让那一天的到来更加美好,
我应该开始好好策划,
两年后的计划。


10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well, you have 4 more years to reach 30.

Always remember, as much as ANYTHING can happen in 4 years, NOTHING can also happen if you do nothing as well.

You never fail to remind me, to live life, not the other way round.

蓝月 said...

yes...

i always have to consciously remind myself,
that time will just pass by,
in a wink of an eye.

before you know,
it's gone.

i don't try to live life fully.

the things you try to fill your life with,
sometimes become a pain,
and turn meaningless.

i can only try to live it,
the way i want it to be,
in my small little ways.

vanille said...

任何人踏入30,都害怕三十岁之前是白过的。其实我们都作了很多事,但是我们还有很多事还没有达成。
但愿你的三十,过得更加灿烂!

蓝月 said...

还有多4年 :)

卡門 said...

不知你有沒有聽過,三十歲才是一個人的開始,“三十歲而不惑”。三十歲之前有太多的顧慮,三十歲人生會豁達起來。

你已經做得很好了,祝福你。

CW said...

最近找到了新工作。办公室性质。老板听了我以前的工作经验,笑笑说:现在你这个工作是进步了,很好很好。我听了笑笑,虽然不同意。跟你一样,他们的观点跟我们的观点不一样。我珍惜的,生命中的事情,不是安安稳稳坐在办公室里作着繁琐的事情。我不介意跟小孩胡闹打滚。我不介意低薪,甚至我父母的不了解。可是我也没有跟老板争执或说明我离开之前的工作是因为健康问题,我尝试现在的工作是因为喜欢翻译。只要我自己明白及坚持自己的信念,即使我离开了这个工作而别人无法认同,我还是能过得没有遗憾。we gotta hold on to our faith, remember? :) After all, they are living their lives and we are living OUR lives.

Anonymous said...

hey, i don't know if your frustration is purely due to work (took a while to understand chinese :P). But really pace yourself. YOu get better in the job and then life is easier once you know what to do. Try other things. OUr circle is really really SMALL. We need to get out to do other things, to experience what we cannot do in our school. Embace life, my dear.

蓝月 said...

蚊子,我想我一辈子都会时不时处于“惑”的状态吧。不过,未尝不是件好事。

当我“惑”的时候,或许是潜意识告诉我,必须为自己思考些什么了。然后才有改变,然后才有成长。

蓝月 said...

是的。Actually, as long as we know what we are heading towards, it doesn't really matter what others think.

对于我而言,最重要是能对我自己交待。过得了自己那关,很多事都变得容易。

蓝月 said...

lynn, i think it's work :)

when i think about what path i want to take, i realised i cant see an end to it.

no to leadership, no to teaching track, but i cant get to specialist track unless i further study and get a Phd.

Am considering a master, but still, that's a long long way to go...

i guess that's why.

i am even considering to go for overseas assignments. but looking at the requirements, 5 years experience... wow 5 years, and i'm only into my 2nd... that's a long way.

i dont know. we shall see what comes along when i fulfil my bond.